15 December 2013: Sunday ... some overcast as 7 days approach since his passing, the snow came yesterday afternoon ... family headed to BWI ...

8 December 2013: The day my father died. ~~ Dr. Rudolph Nyhoff (August 22, 1928 - December 8, 2013) ~~

Mom comes up the steps to begin the process of goodbye in the
early a.m. of Sunday, December 8, 2013, the day of dad's death. 

Kim, the RN on duty on the night shift, 12-8, at Delaware Hospice, came in the early morning to provide some medical assistance to our dying father and husband. She couldn't do much but she provided support and just coming out was such a help.



Not a few minutes after writing my "dying" post in reference to my father's distaste of snow and the fact that on this gloriously blissful snowfall, he was leaving this earth, I took this pic of Dancer in the snow and made my "Daily Dancer" post.



Joelle Essombe, LPN, from Cameroon, was at his bedside with mom and me when he passed at 2 p.m. She was not able to pronounce him as an RN has to do that and Kim, from the morning shift, came back with her kids in the car (Joelle went outside to watch them.) to do the paperwork on his death, a required document for the funeral home to pick up the body.


We used wash cloths, soaked in cold water, for dad's head. He would open his eyes on occasion, as he appears to be doing here and seem to respond to our words. Mom was yeoman in her holding the damp, chilly cloths on his forehead. His eyes are slightly open. He is aware. Just shortly before he breathed his last, Lindsay and Nick got to speak to him. He didn't speak but he heard.

It was unmistakable just a few minutes after he passed.
The essence of what made my father was gone. He died
at 2 p.m. on Sunday, December 8, 2013, roughly 85 years
and 106 days after entering this earth on August 22, 1928.


They'd been busy on this snowy day and the funeral employees of Mealey Funeral Home had already picked up two bodies and gotten stuck in the snow before they arrived in the late afternoon at 4546 Pickwick Drive and left with the body of my father, who went from his home of 50 years for the last time. Mom got to say goodbye with the assistance of these marvelous providers and hard working grieving professionals. The body was wrapped in a cloth and in a device they use to take bodies down from mountains. It hugged him securely. He was safe. Mom got to kiss him on the forehead with the able help of the Mealey employees before they put him on the stretcher and wheeled him out making tracks in the snow, down the front yard and into the dark van. The snow had stopped.  

29 November 2013: Friday ... put away the iPhone, I want some alone time with dad to say goodbye ... tears flowed but they're OK Doug, he laughed, too ... life is balance

That Eternal Day - Cantus 

Serendipity, a divine presence, a coincidence, who knows,
but this morning, before I got up at 5 a.m., Performance
Today featured a performance by Cantus and their rendition
of Gravedigger by Dave Matthews, a story about death but
more about the effect their lives had on the lives that continue. "Don't
bury me too deep, so I can hear the rain hit the earth," or a similar
lyric moves throughout the song. I am still here in spirit, do not
forget me. I included the experience in a note that I wrote and
left for my **BROTHER** which he read and I think was moved
by. Later, when he asked for time alone with dad, I could hear the
tears -- that's tough for Doug, he doesn't show emotion, he's pretty
good at covering it up -- and they were good. Our father shall not
be forgotten, at least by his two sons. 

Left early evening after mom had been fed and dad taken care of ... I gave him the cell phone to call if necessary and then left to pick up Lindsay at the airport, U.S. Airways flight from Charlotte due to land at 6:19 p.m. I arrived with time to spare at the "Cell Phone" waiting area with its displays of the arriving flights and whether they'd landed. Here flight was on time, she texted me and then called me telling me she was ready at the U. S. Airways sign. Saw her right away and got her in at which time she noticed the egging that the Honda had received and I knew nothing about, all on the passenger side of the car. How long it'd been there, I do not know. (It's been addressed and cleaned with a car wash this Saturday morning after a trip to Mary's Kountry Kitchen for breakfast, a stop for birthday cards at Books & Tobacco and then to the car wash establishment, where it's not cheap but they do a good, attentive job for $14.95 plus tip ... I gave $3 today).

Well, I got this nice pic of Lindsay kissing mom as she arrived in her bedroom.