Hmm. Crazy me or crazy computer! Anyway...I was planning to say; I truly commend you for what you are doing. My mother had advanced staged Alzheimer's; and when my father became ill; and sadly, dying; of Esophageal Cancer; I brought my mother to live with me. I lived next door to my parent's on some of daddy's farm. I would not trade those days with my mother for all of the world's riches. Despite her illness; during her lucid periods; I learned a side to my mother that I never knew. I was SO in awe of her faith; which never once left her. After my father's death; my mother fell into a deep grief. Her doctor flatly told me that I was being ridiculous to even think she was aware of his death. ***scoff***She KNEW. Daily she called his name; begging him to "come and get her." It was like a mantra. 8 weeks after his death; my mother had fallen from still being ambulatory and eating well; to being bedridden and refusing most food. Thankfully, she seemed to like drinking chocolate Boost; and their puddings. But she was sinking fast...the last weekend of her life; she awakened me about 5 am...I had begun sleeping on the sofa in John's office where her hospice bed had been set up...I told her time...she asked the day...I told her that...and then she said: "well. I think I will go be with Pal today." Pal, being my father. Trying fiercely not to sound tearful, I said to her, "well. that's OK. If you think that is what you want to do; then we will all be just fine. You do what you must do." She sighed deeply, then she asked me to sing. Despite the early hour, and my choked back tears, I gave it a whirl. I croaked out one of her favorite hymns. Her very last spoken words to me were; "there should be 4." I have 3 siblings. I assured her that it was just very early in the morning..that they others would be by later. She nodded; and then drifted off to sleep. By noon she had fallen into a coma. For the next 3 days I never left her side. Finally late Monday evening; she left this world. As I said before; I feel SO honored; and SO humbled; to have spent my mother's last days caring for her. It wasn't always easy. There were times when caring for her personal needs were just plain gross and hard to take; but I would chant to myself; she did this for you, when you were a baby...and somehow; it would not seem quite so loathsome a thing to do. And there were some truly funny moments. My mother was Methodist; but John and I attend a local Baptist Church. The week before she died; the minister came to give her Communion. As he prepared to leave; he offered to say a prayer. I knew what was about to come! My mother believed; the only prayer you needed to say aloud was the Lord's Prayer; followed by the Apostle's Creed. The Minister, launched into a lengthy Baptist Prayer. My mother got restless. Suddenly, she just hollered out the word "NO!" Naturally the Minister looked taken aback and confused! I said to him; "I think she wants the Lord's Prayer; and it would sure help if you know the Apostle's Creed!" Thankfully, he did! So we started all over; and my mother was happy! I smile to myself in my mind when I remember those humorous times. How LUCKY I was; to be there to share in them with her! So anyway, I applaud you with ardor for what you are doing. You will not regret it. I can promise you that with all of my heart! You and your parent's and Dancer (!) have my most humble prayers. God be with you all....Fondly, Carol
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